Seasoned Reminiscence A Culmination

It had been long since I enjoyed something so intricately. My grandma and her brother visited our place in Cochin last Saturday. I call her amma because of the affection she has for me and still loves to call her amma because of the beautiful, passionate memoirs she and her accompanying good oldies casted in my reminiscence. After my grandfather and later on my great grandmother passed away (really miss them) my amma and mama became alone in the home with infrequent visits from cousins and relatives …which made them pretty occupied. We picked them from Ernakulam North Station and made our way to our home.Malu seeing amma and mama for the second time (Poor malu she really is missing her valuable time) was shy not talking much but maneuvering her special smile…:)The next day brought in more enthusiasm and spasm in us as we were moving towards mama s friends house. Although I had memory power starking at glimpses of that Uncle (On hearing his name from Mama), When I saw him I felt bravo ...

In the lush garden Among the beautiful roses With thorns, I stood The Daffodil whom all loves... My life, with colorful petals Sweet nectar and soft pollen Bloomed in sunlight... Glowing beauty none could fathom A tiny angel from far away Ignoring other flowers Had me in her tender arms... The soft touch, delicate Taken away into an island I enjoyed subtle moments of life Away from garden I enjoyed, Cupids presence... Soon my petals lost its luster Leaves withered away Worn out, I cried... Alone, in the darkness of night Cupid never came then Taken away from dear ones Mesmerizing beauty of mine Lost in the midst of air... Sweet memories of the past Creating mental reverberations Cacophonic outcome, despair Loneliness my best companion...

Why this man is haunting…making me remembers those lost moments…. Is he an auditor or something to dispatch my worst habit at him and later come up with some other reason…? I know he is not my friend…not a lover since I lost that…and not brother because I have many and I don’t want him to be that… Why he is coming behind me to dissolute my existence of a mere human… It’s a pain in the deep corner of my side which uproots up each time when such incidence occurs… It’s that lunatic wave i.e. approaching me each time I do this…It’s the toxic negation of beautiful lost moments that I take each time I remember you…Please leave me alone…I can’t be my lost soul again… I am not the same human… Leave me alone…I am lost in this world with no one for compassion. Not even a single soul makes my life better…

Will you resurrect with this humble tribute? Will you keep this with you or Another vicious cycle dooming Will you find that…what you are searching for… You sing the song so beautiful… Your cry makes this world beautiful… But for how long.... You will die out of pain… Don’t ignite out of fury… This is a world of wisdom and toxin… Will another lifecycle change your destiny? Are you ready for a resurrection…? Will a rebirth make you happy? Because same blood and same mud Makes a human composition… Wires in brains differ… And all point to the same crux… Life is important…not love… Don’t you resurrect nor cry… You cry in itself is a melody… Pain is flowing in thy lyrics… I want you to be happy… Don’t you ignite nor cry… You are beautiful with golden plumages It takes another thousand years for you… Agony in the end Don’t you resurrect nor cry…

As my mind covers you wholly… It had been fathomed abstrusely Journeying with you in quintessence As I touched your bosom With care sharing a love note… You knelt before me… Fulfilling all my desires… Another autumn sprouted With a chivalric and mysterious Lover, the reason for my lovely dawn And times of romantic dusks… Fall and love fall… Sweet and bitter cruises Alluring moods Still holding back… Disgusting talks nudging me Cajoled still attempting to make it right… Memoirs left behind Still eulogizing you and will be till I die My love making your hands bleed… Nothing went right… Reminiscence behold me to live And never will another autumn sprout for me…

After a long gap I was spending my holidays in my own land .Visiting relatives and closed ones after a long gap was indeed an exuberant happiness .Apart from that the warm climate rejuvenated me bringing in the sweet memories of childhood .The Kannur special cuisines drove me crazy when my Grandma made the very homely, yummy dishes and its very delicious when it’s made from her own hands (which fed me all these years). Although the journey was tiresome, a 7 hours travel from Kochi ….After taking a light nap at my home (The Tharavadu as Malayalis call it) and making a stride through the yard which was once a beautiful flamboyant garden in the front with lush edible fruit bearing trees beyond…a playground for me and my cousins …we moved to visit our relatives… Many tearful eyes made me heavy when I poured gifts for them…although their happiness eased my mind and soul. The idols and photos placed in my home brought tears in me. The photo of Krishna hugging the cow was still lovely alt...

I have no words to say other than sarcasm that’s flowing thru my mind… A crucial incident paved the way to this vehemence…. I don’t know when it will change… A feeling of indifference to everything… Again onwards sincerity will only be a playful part of life.  I am bitten by a snake, the poison and the wound will take time to vanish and I don’t know how long…maybe till my life ends…or may be after some years…but it is really painful. This is leading into an soar vengeance…and will one day blurt…That incident will take time longer than usual… The bad taste of waiting for long, bleeding all years will one day show the way to the ultimate aim… I am waiting for that day…